Being a "great mom" sounds like a lot of work. You already do so much and still do not feel as though you fit that profile. You think there must be more to being a "great mom." You must be missing that one piece of the puzzle that will give you the glory of motherhood. But what is it? Hopefully after reading this article, you will feel energized and recharged, and you may be surprised to find out that you have been a "great mom" all the while.
Before listing the traits of a "great mom," let's clarify that there is a huge difference between a "great mom" and a "super mom." Truth be told, a "super mom" does not really exist. She is an alter ego that sets out to make moms everywhere feel like that they have to push harder and do more. The common symptoms of "super mom-itis" (the disease that comes from trying to be a "super mom") are:
- Feeling like you have to compete with other moms to fill up your calendar and always be busy doing things. Jesus says in Matthew 11:28, "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest." Jesus does not want us to be going in all different directions. He wants us to feel peaceful.
- Feeling incomplete or let down because you have one second of your life where nothing is going on. If you are not busy doing or planning something, you feel as if you have no ambition. Times like this are actually a good thing! Take this time to read a book, lie down on the couch and watch TV, or perhaps go for a nice walk and get some fresh air with no agenda. Be thankful for these times. These are times when you can really concentrate on spiritual life and prayer.
- Being convinced that you are going to give your children a better life than you had, whereby either spoiling them or you living in constant reminder of bad memories. What is behind you is gone. There is no need to relive things like that. You should look to the present and the future, and enjoy your kids with the relationship that only you can have with them. Being stressed out to make things perfect or better will seep into their lives, too, and rob both of you of the joys you can have today.
Now let's move on to the traits of a "great mom" and what it means to the people around you:
- She can take a rest and enjoy some time to herself. This gives her a chance to revitalize and rejuvinate, giving her a better outlook on the family. And by the way, mom's do get sick and deserve to be pampered by family members when she is!
- She recognizes that each mom has a different set of parenting skills, and she doesn't have to try to be like anyone else. She realizes that God made her special and gave her the exact skills she needs to be a parent to the child(ren) He has blessed her with.
- She realizes that her children do not expect her to do miracles. She usually has put those expectations on herself. Kids just want Band-Aids for their boo-boos, torn clothes to be mended, a sandwich for school, and a kiss on the cheek that says, "I love you." It is the simple things and the personal attention that you give your child that makes you a "great mom."
- She knows that when she does volunteer as a room mom, a chaperone, or some other position, she is doing it because she really wants to and does not feel like she has to prove anything to anyone else.
I encourage you to read (or re-read) Psalm 31, and you will discover that if you love your family and fulfill their needs above others, you have been a "great mom" all along.
